Mental Toughness

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Re: Mental Toughness

I like your psychological goal, you have to think about how you are going to achieve it; what strategies you can use.

The first is to stop doing yourself down! You are a top order batsman but you let us believe you have no successes in your arsenal. No manager or coach would put a failing batsman up there!

The rest is up to you.

On the other matter, unfortunately, not all of us can be on the forum as much as others and [thankfully] there are so many postings that if you have been off for a couple of days, it is almost impossible to catch up with every posting; some will be missed.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Liz,

I'll give you the details of it all.

I'll just go through my county stuff, as in club regardless as to whether I'm 'in touch', I'll be a success, not wishing to sound arrogant.

U10 (when i was 9)
Ave: 63 (2 innings, 1 NO)

U10
Ave: 46

U11
Ave: 37

U12
Ave: 31

U13
Ave: 18

U14:
Ave:19

The problems of confidence started during the winter of the up and coming U13 season.

Anyway, how I'll go about is to purely clear my mind of any thoughts and not concern myself with where my feet are moving, just let it happen.

And, although I'm not expecting an instant response off him when I email him, he is usually pretty prompt. I know he's busy, but if logs on for a bit but doesn't have time, he'll just send me a mail saying he'll get back to me at a more convenient time, and I can't imagine him not logging in at all.......
 
Re: Mental Toughness

kallis fan said:
The problems of confidence started during the winter of the up and coming U13 season.
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Do you know what happened? If so, was it cricket related or personal?

kallis fan said:
Anyway, how I'll go about is to purely clear my mind of any thoughts and not concern myself with where my feet are moving, just let it happen.
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A good strategy!

kallis fan said:
And, although I'm not expecting an instant response off him when I email him, he is usually pretty prompt. I know he's busy, but if logs on for a bit but doesn't have time, he'll just send me a mail saying he'll get back to me at a more convenient time, and I can't imagine him not logging in at all.......
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He may be out of the country for a while. Don't worry about it, I am sure you will hear soon, maybe in the New Year.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Liz Ward said:
Do you know what happened? If so, was it cricket related or personal?

A good strategy!

He may be out of the country for a while. Don't worry about it, I am sure you will hear soon, maybe in the New Year.
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Cricket related. In actual fact, it was the same winter a First Class team were keeping 'tabs' on me. (ie; I wasn't on the actual academy, but would be training with them) Pressure too much? And, I basically fell out with the manager at that age group, so that wasn't exactly helpful.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Oh KF, I am extremely sorry to hear this. Somebody should have intervened; somebody in all this business should have been watching for this.

I get tired of hearing about child protection and good practices and how we coaches are using it to protect ourselves but who is protecting the children from the pressures we put them under?

The bottom line is, I am afraid, there is nothing you, I or anybody else can do about this now. I know it is easy for me to say that this is all in the past but you are the one living with it; with all the 'what if(s)'.

You are an older, wiser person now. Know that what happened was not your fault; with the right help from the right support team, you could have overcome this problem. It is not an uncommon problem and 12 is a very young age to deal with it without the proper support.

This coming season is the first of many more you are going to enjoy. You have the talent to make it the beginning of a great career, only you can stand in your way.

Take everything in your stride, remember why you are doing this, enjoy it! Tackle everything you do completely, with gusto. You have nothing to lose by doing so; if things do not go your way, you gain experience. Learn to be great!
 
Re: Mental Toughness

It was all too much too soon I feel. It's not anyone's fault.....God....on reflection I can see that I'm lucky enough to have even have been involved in a first class county 'setup' at some point....even though I perhaps didn't realise at the time.

There's still people that want to put pressure on me, pro inclusive. To be quite honest, I just want to enjoy the game again. It's shown, from the stats that ever since this little experience of a first class county setup that I've suffered. I suffered from the pressure of being there in the U13 season, and suffered from the pressure I put on MYSELF to perform and basically 'hit back' at the previous manager this season (as in 2007).

You should write a book, by the way.

Any books you would recommend, whilst I'm at it?

;)
 
Re: Mental Toughness

I'm not expert KF, but i sounds like the pressure is getting to you, and you know what they say when the pressure gets too much, get out! Take a break, or go the whole hog, move to another club. It may seem a bit too much but if you're coaches are piling the pressure on then why stay?
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Simbazz said:
I'm not expert KF, but i sounds like the pressure is getting to you, and you know what they say when the pressure gets too much, get out! Take a break, or go the whole hog, move to another club. It may seem a bit too much but if you're coaches are piling the pressure on then why stay?
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I've had this debate with a few people quite frequently...

I play for a relatively small club, a big fish in a small pond if you like. I personally don't feel this is the issue. The pressure comes from two quarters:

a) Pro who is no longer with us
b) People within county setup

And regardless of what other things to be said of me.......I am a loyal person and want to repay back the debt to my club in giving me the opportunity to play and help me progress.....even if it has been primarily my dad, probably because he is the 'main' coach.....
 
Re: Mental Toughness

KF, I for one, am extremely proud of you. I really do believe you will get there; you have a great head on your shoulders and talent to boot. Just use them well.

I hope you tell your Dad how you feel; your fears and your gratitude. Quite often, when people are close to you, especially when they have been close since you were small, lose sight of your wants and needs and if you do not have a dialogue, if you do not communicate, they may believe that you are happy to be pushed in a certain direction.

Play for yourself, tell your Dad your plans, your goals. If he sees you are taking control, he may ensure the coaches let off a little.

If you get a bit shaky in a situation, just ask yourself, "What would Simbazz do?" :D

Go out there to enjoy yourself, relax and let it come to you. It will you know and it is not too late for the County scene... that is, if you want it ;)


Text books are not usually that helpful, unfortunately or fortunately, individuals are... well... individual and never appear to conform to text books :laugh:

Have fun KF and keep us updated with your progress.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Liz Ward said:
If you get a bit shaky in a situation, just ask yourself, "What would Simbazz do?" :D
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Well Liz, i'm afraid i'm a 7yr pro at this game, and i've played quite a lot of games in them 7 years, especially with playing as captain, and playing quite a lot of other games such as charity games. I also play through the winter, so i know what i'm talking about......most of the time :laugh:
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Of course, but it is not just what you know.

You are always up for the challenge, whatever that would be. I should not think it even occurs to you that you may not succeed... and if you do not, I should think you just get on with it and look for the next one.

I can imagine you getting up in the morning and saying, "Come on World, give me all you've got!"

I find you exceedingly refreshing ;)
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Liz Ward said:
Of course, but it is not just what you know.

You are always up for the challenge, whatever that would be. I should not think it even occurs to you that you may not succeed... and if you do not, I should think you just get on with it and look for the next one.

I can imagine you getting up in the morning and saying, "Come on World, give me all you've got!"

I find you exceedingly refreshing ;)
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What can i say Liz, there's very few of us left.

A challange is a challange, win or fail, you should be having fun. Cricket is no differnt. Win or fail, you enjoy it, you meet some of the greatest guys/gals in the world (thats how i found my girlfriend ;)) and most importantly, you do something you love!
 
Re: Mental Toughness

As I say, exceedingly refreshing Simbazz.

I would love to see your inspirational pre match talk to your guys. I suspect you could probably make a living out of it. Some guys do after dinner speeches, you could hire yourself out as a pre match speaker!

The greatest thing is that you play for the right reason and I should think you encourage your team mates to do the same.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

The inspirtational speaking thing may or may not be true,you'd have to ask my team mates, but when i'm excited, usually before a game, you can't shut me up, i talk on the field to!! :eek:

See, this off topicness between myself and Liz is for a reason, although Liz may not realise it, i've just proved that self confidence brings rewards. If your confident, your improve, if you're confident, you're mentally tough!
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Unfortunately, Liz, I feel that my Dad is too close to the situation, and I generally avoid asking him, or telling him for that matter, anything cricket related that involves my game.

I much prefer an outsider if you like, coaching me.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

I think Liz will back me up here, If you cant ask your coach advice (even if he is your father) then who else can you ask? The answer is not a lot of other people, because others dont know your strengths and weaknesses.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Simbazz is right but I understand where you are coming from. When my son was old enough to go into the weight room, I found an excellent Personal Trainer for him. I think this worried the Personal Trainer more than anybody though :D

However, we talked a lot about what he was doing and he constantly asked me if what he had been asked to do was functional for his needs and whether his technique was safe.

You really do need to find a way to talk. Your Dad may surprise you, especially if you show him you are taking control.

Do you worry that he will take that control from you? Or are you afraid that he may not be able to see the wood for the trees?
 
Re: Mental Toughness

Don't get me wrong, we talk, we talk a lot about cricket that is for sure. But, in the past we've disagreed about certain things regarding technical issues etc. I don't blame him, I just I don't think that as my dad he can be objective.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

KF, he knows better, by the sounds of it, you're being a model teenager. Not wanting to do as your told, and believing that your way is the right way.

Listen to your dad, by the sounds of it, he is probably right.
 
Re: Mental Toughness

kallis fan said:
...I just I don't think that as my dad he can be objective.
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It is true and for somebody of your age to appreciate this is something special.

I lose my usual cool when I train my sons. I have no problems with their mates; calm, relaxed, patient etc but with my sons, I am 'trainer from hell' :eek: :laugh:

I find it easier to finely tune their technique than teach it and can talk about it until the cows come home.

I think your Dad may be aware of the problem; avoid technique, just talk to him about your goals, especially the psychological one. He will be so proud of you being able to take control.

Always bear in mind that there are three types of people in this World:

Those who make things happen;
Those who watch things happen; and
Those who say 'What the hell happened?'

Successful people, people who reach their goals, make things happen!
 
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